Newstome’s Weblog

Sometimes you’ll write when you need to write. I did that after we broke up, but now I feel more like myself. As a result, I’ve written less.

It’s been three months since we broke up, which means if we were still together we’d have been together for ten months, and had been talking for more than a year. Obviously those milestones are imaginary pebbles now. After we broke up, I wanted us to be friends right away. I knew the relationship wasn’t working, but I really, deep down in my heart felt that a friendship was the way to go. Caring for him wasn’t the issue, it was loving him the way he loved me that just didn’t line up. I think he wanted me to take care of all the stuff that hadn’t happened for him yet. Be that finding a good job, moving away from home, among other things.

Just recently we have begun to talk. It is pretty casual. Nothing too serious, just two people who know a lot about each other not necessarily making that fact crystal clear. It’s like we are learning to be friends, and re-getting to know each other in that vein. I’ll always love him, but like I said before, it’s not the love that will define my life and heart.

Still, I am really glad we have found a way to communicate. Whether we want to admit it or not, for a long time we’ll still have a prime seat in the back of each others’ mind.